It’s no secret that the modern world is a tough place to live. Everywhere we look, there are people telling us how we should be living–what we should eat, drink and wear; what kind of work we should do; and what our relationships with other people should be like. It’s easy to feel like you’re losing control of your life and becoming more and more disconnected from who you really are…but it doesn’t have to be this way. I want to talk for a moment about mindfulness: why it can help, how it works, and one simple thing men, in particular, can do every day to start re-connecting with themselves right now. Here goes…
What does it actually mean to be mindful?
There are many definitions that have been offered by scholars, Buddhist practitioners, and mindfulness teachers. One definition that is often cited is from Jon Kabat-Zinn who says: “Mindfulness is awareness, cultivated by paying attention in a sustained and particular way: on purpose, in the present moment, and nonjudgmentally to the unfolding of experience moment by moment.” Another example comes from Thích Nhất Hạnh, Zen Master, poet, and peace activist, revered around the world for his pioneering teachings on mindfulness and often called “The Father of Mindfulness,”: “I define mindfulness as the practice of being fully present and alive, body and mind united. Mindfulness is the energy that helps us to know what is going on in the present moment.”
What Is Mindfulness?
The definition I use is “Mindfulness is purposely, and without judgment, being aware of and awake to the present moment.”
Mindfulness can give us a way of looking at things differently and enables us to relate to all of the experiences in our life which might be causing stress, anxiety, uncomfortableness, or just preventing us from living our best life. This, in turn, can allow us the potential to completely transform ourselves.
As men, we’re always looking for ways to solve the causes of our suffering and deal with it more easily. And as such, we start asking ourselves questions such as: “Why don’t I feel better?” or “Is there something I can do or something that can be prescribed so that the pain goes away?”. People like me end up spending a lot of time and money on what they hope will offer relief and yet nothing seems to work.
I think most men can agree that they have struggled emotionally in their lives. We deal with a lot of adverse circumstances. It is hard to lose people or things that you care about, and we hate having to deal with things that we don’t want to do. I’ve learned that one way to feel better is through mindfulness. Mindfulness is 2500-year-old practice of Buddhist psychology. All it takes is 10-15 minutes each day to experience what it feels like. Mindfulness comes from within because you are really tapping into your intuition and the pre-conceptual part of your mind. If you give it a chance, I think you’ll find immediate benefits like higher energy levels, more patience, sharper focus, less tension in the body.
Why Does It Matter?
With practice over time, you can figure out how to become more and more mindful in your everyday life. Mindfulness can help even if you are in the middle of significant suffering, stress, anxiety, uncomfortableness, or just that your life isn’t as full or calm as you feel it should be. Mindfulness has been compared to a deeply personal journey of discovery. Mindfulness, in and of itself, isn’t the overall goal. Mindfulness is meant to bring about awareness, attention, and remembering. Awareness means becoming aware and fully enjoying and appreciating the things around you no matter how small it is. The true purpose of mindfulness is to rid yourself of needless suffering.
How do you do this? You do this by becoming aware and cultivating insights into how your mind works and the meaning of everything in the material world we live in. You’re looking for ways to calm your mind and bring peace and ease to your world. When you are attentive, it means that you are participating in focused awareness. That means that you are aware of what is occurring within and around you. When you participate in this “awareness” you can begin to free yourself from mental preoccupation and difficult emotions.
Through Mindfulness you are re-training your mind in order to manage it. Mindfulness allows you to develop other mental qualities, including concentration, loving-kindness, ease of effort, and becoming more alert.
How To Apply It
Mindfulness is not an end-all or doorway to happiness. It can provide you with the foundation you need to build those skills. By allowing yourself to get rid of habits in your mind that can cause you unhappiness, the result will be letting go of anger, envy, greed, or other harmful behaviors that serve no purpose. Mindfulness brings about self-acceptance and self-understanding. We bring upon ourselves unwanted emotional and behavioral problems simply by trying to avoid discomfort and throwing ourselves into some other sort of change-seeking activity. Mindfulness is about awareness and acceptance first and changes second
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Mindfulness is a practice that has been around for centuries. It’s no coincidence then, that it’s making its way into the lives of more and more people as we continue to grow in our knowledge of how the human brain works. The benefits are numerous, but here are just some reasons why mindfulness might be worth giving a try- increased productivity at work, better focus when studying or driving home from school or work with less stress on your mind and body. If you’re looking for ways to incorporate this ancient practice into your day-to-day life without feeling like you have to change everything about yourself too drastically, there are plenty of simple tactics we share here that can help get you started today! Check them out in the related articles below as well as the rest of the site.
“Good questions outrank easy answers.” – Paul A. Samuelson (American economist)
- What is your take on meditation?
- Why would any man concern themselves with being more mindful?
- In what ways can a man use mindfulness to better himself, his life and the lives of those around him?
Want more? Get the free guide “Quiet Confidence: A Men’s Guide to Living a Free, Authentic, Joyful, Centered, & Purposeful Life“
This workbook will introduce mindfulness as a foundation for living a more deliberate, authentic, purposeful life of peace, freedom, health, and fulfillment.
